What Is Your Love Language?
Discover how you best give and receive love through these totally realistic scenarios.
You wake up to find a mysterious handwritten note under your pillow. It says:
About This Quiz
Modern love is mostly sending TikToks and wondering if anything matters anymore. This quiz digs through your emotional mess and spits out a half-baked label. It’s not therapy, but it is faster. This unhinged diagnostic cuts past the love songs and straight into the mess. How do you express attachment in a world that ghosted itself? We’re not decoding your soulmate potential. We’re categorizing your emotional coping strategies. Is it love, or do you just send them TikToks about mental illness and call it intimacy? Either way, we’ll give you a label and call it done.
You wake up to find a mysterious handwritten note under your pillow. It says:
• “You are the spark in my disco ball.”
• “I made you pancakes and cleaned your dishes.”
• “I got you that rare vinyl you wanted.”
• “Let’s spend the afternoon building blanket forts.”
• “Come here for a giant bear hug.”
Your partner volunteers to take on one chore you dread. You:
• Cheer them on with a dramatic speech.
• Watch in awe as they smash that chore.
• Reward them with a quirky surprise gift.
• Sit beside them and chat while they work.
• Give them a playful high-five or back rub.
You find a single quirky sock left on your coffee table. You assume they want to:
• Send you a poetic sock limerick later.
• Wash your laundry in secret while you sleep.
• Give you the full pair tomorrow with a bow.
• Spend the evening sock-puppet theater together.
• Slide into a spooning snuggle on the couch.
They propose a spontaneous mini road-trip in a clown car. You:
• Recite an ode about the absurdity of life.
• Let them drive while you navigate and pump gas.
• Pack a box of tiny souvenir clown noses.
• Spend hours talking through your wildest dreams.
• Cuddle in the back seat through every honk.
It’s raining rubber ducks outside. They hand you one. You:
• Shout “You’re my duck-hero!”
• Let them chase puddles while you film their rescue.
• Collect them all as a surprise display.
• Stand under an umbrella together and chat.
• Hold their hand through every splash.
Your partner writes your name in glow-in-the-dark glitter. You:
• Thank them with a heartfelt poem.
• Help them clean up every speck of glitter.
• Frame a chunk as a keepsake gift.
• Sit and chat under blacklight while it glows.
• Give them a gentle hug to wipe it away.
At midnight they surprise you with your favorite midnight snack. You:
• Declare it “the feast of love” in verse.
• Let them prepare it while you lounge.
• Display it on a pedestal with a bow.
• Eat it together by candlelight and talk.
• Feed each other bites directly from the plate.
They book a surprise pottery class for you two. You:
• Write love messages on each pot with your finger.
• Clean up the clay mess afterward stealthily.
• Present each finished pot as a gift later.
• Laugh and chat throughout the entire lesson.
• Hold hands while shaping clay together.
They send you a playlist titled “Our Weird Love.” You:
• Listen and text back a haiku review.
• Download it and install as your alarm tone.
• Burn it onto a mixtape with a sticker label.
• Play it on repeat during your walk together.
• Snuggle close and dance through the speakers.
You find a fortune cookie that reads “Love is a…?” You:
• Write back “sonnet in a shell.”
• Use the cookie shards to spell “I’ll do anything.”
• Tuck the cookie in your wallet as a charm.
• Share it over coffee and discuss its meaning.
• Feed it piece by piece to your partner’s hand.
